New Member Lincoln

My baby boy Lincoln has finally appear in my life. He born on 1st June 2010. The whole family of Lim and Lee, is overjoy of his arrival. I always enjoy seeing Lincoln smiles and laugh..
He is always so cheeky...

Darling.. You must always be cheerful and healthy. Mummy and Daddy loves you uh... = )

My new family member to be :Baby Lincoln

It been quite sometime, since I last blogged. My faithful God has bless me greatly.
In 2008 after I had my miscarriage, with despair heart and stress. I blamed the Lord from taking away my "Hope".


After a month from that incident, I was married to Andy (June 2008), and a week later on one particular night, the Lord spoke to me, that He promised that He will give me another baby by October. While, I eagarly waiting for October to come.. I was still not conceive after 2008. I began to give up in believing what God had promised me. I lost my track and not knowing what to do.. but just keep "trying" and trying till my "dream" come to pass.


I tired from Aug 2008 till Sept 2009. Finally in October 2009, I am pregnant! The Lord did keep His promise, just that He never mentioned which year October. (LOL)
Currently I am 6months and 2 days pregnant. And is a baby boy. We going to name him,
Lincoln Lim Kai En. He is going to be my pride.


I don't want to be call like someone... only blame God when there is problem, and never give thanks when He blessed me.
Hereby, I will want to thank God for all this He had done for me. Love You Jesus.
May You continue watch over Lincoln, Andy, my mum and me.. In Jesus name I asked. Amen!

Everlasting

Learnt from a friend that her marriage is about to come to an end. Although, we have been taught since Sunday school, there is nothing on earth will be lasting except God who is in Heaven watching over us. I couldn't help but having this bitterness in myself. This few nights I couldn't sleep well. I have been stress over work and my health



Friendship may easily tearing apart, someone that you used to sleep beside every night also can turn their back toward you someday. Another shocking was Popstar Michael Jackson had passed away, being that he wasn't my idol but I really feel pity for him. What trauma that he had gone thru, we might never understand, we only know is the physco side of him going thru plastic surgeon and child abusing.
Sigh... Actually many times I want to write out my feeling toward the world and people around. I feel so disappointed over issues in life.



And yeah, I somewhat also disappointed in God. Life is never be fair to me. NEVER!! I am no popstar, but my adventure is as complicated as them. With all this testimonial that I have, it didn't bring any glory to live on. I admit I am a 100% attention seeker. cos' I am always an entertainer to all my friends. Everyone can come to be for prayers, advise and jokes. but there is no one could understand my most inner being. I do doubt my faith in God too. When I post this qtn: "No one understand me!" Thousand of christian will shoot back, " GOD DOES!"
If He does, why He let me suffer so so so much? I am not like Paul or Job... I am just SANDY living in Singapore crying out for mercy.





I sometime really staying alone with all by myself together with my laptop. Well... they have a new way calling that, 宅女 someone that enjoy staying at home, eating at home, shop at home... everything just doing at home. I just don't want to interfere with others neither do I want to be bother by others. =~~~(

New Year New Wishes but Same Hope~~~(Vent anger in my blog)

I have been hoping and thinking since my last miscarriage. Things has not been getting any better but still coping well. I know my desprate cannot solve the issue, but I just hate seeing every month seeing my period "visit" me.



I don't care if people what they going to think of me, cos' I find that I don't have to answer to them. Especially those OLD WOMEN... They can easily bear gudges and haterous. I am not interested. I more concern about my life, my family and my future.



This year theme is to Love one another. I know I have reacting selfishly, but I really not ready to share love with those self-centre fellows. Life still have to go on... Days will not stand still... My Wishes yet fulfilled. Lord I am sorry that I may be very selfish, I really tired of pleasing humans. I am also human why aren't people pleasing me??? They can throw their "mood" at me? I can't never be emtional to anyone.. I cannot vent my anger, I cannot shout out loud! I can't show my unhappiness. I have been mute whenever I face my problem. When they are sick I must show attention to them, Whenever they are not in the mood, I must be a joker to cheer them up. When they are sad, I must consol them! WTF!!!! Why things have to been "level" differently??????

The Lord still remember me

I have been attending service for 3 weeks... I was down with depression over work and family matter.
Sudeenly feel that I very worn out by things around me. I have been avoiding Jasmine and the rest just wish to get some peace to figure out things.
Yesterday, the Lord has given a surprise again. I can't tell you what it is till time is ripe. The Lord still remember me and He is going to give me a birthday present by next year.

Soon is going to be X'mas. My mood still feeling up and down. I have settle my emotion before 2009 arrive.

Love your neighbor as yourself

"Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind and with all your strength. 'second is this: 'Love your neighbor as yourself.'There is no commandment greater than these." " Mark 12:30-31

Next year my Church theme is to love our neighbor as ourself... Not many of us understand this. Loving our God is a must but God also want us to love our neighbor include our enemies that is around us. We need not to be prophetic to love someone, overall loving someone is out from heart.



Being so, I have recetnly form an enemy, God has tested me to love her. We have not been really talking to one another, face to face for 3 weeks. I do feel little weird and uncomfortable, but I still find that my purpose was to encourage her to love someone she ever dislike not to mock or provoke her. Guess I have failed.... or maybe not.



Lately, I observe that she manage to talk to that someone she dislike in a nicer manner, matter of fact, she treating me like a stranger. Sigh... I have no objection over this. Cause I already know God will deal with this, end of the day she herself is going to answer to Abba Father above.


Just that I don't understand how can her "emotion" be some subjective. I don't think I ever see her flare up with Jasmine. Sigh..... I sometime, just wondering am I a woman, why I never have such roller coaster mood swing like others. Perhaps, I had just that I don't do it on friends but Andy (my hubby)



In the first place, our friendship some times back was already having problem just that we ignoring and not mending it. HowAnd now all surfacing out. Since after I got married, I could see that she getting more insecure, maybe I am wrong... but no matter what, Lord please handle this problem. If there is necessary for me to leave.. please give me a sign.

Pity me~

Couldn't help feeling miserable. Browse through some of my old friend's profile at friendster and facebook. I just getting envious.. over their "success" Sigh.....



Joanne was once my best friend during Secondary School days, we used to be the most notorious in school, till and extend my discipline master have to call up our parents daily to monitor our behaviours. We shared the same personality and ideas.



However, things changed after Secondary 2 streaming, Joanne promoted to Science Stream whereas I gone up to Art Stream... we didn't really keep in touch after that, we barely talk to one another. Lately, got to find out from her friendster that she has given birth to a baby boy... and I began to feel life is so unfair to me. She gotten all her desires so easily and I have to strive so hard yet stuck at the same place. Read through her profile and see those photo in her friendster, then got to know she has gotten her degree at Melbourne, and was posted to Japan to work and also her son is 3 months old.



Of course, I am proud with her and her success, but I helplessly questioning God when will have such "fortune"? At my age, many ones has visited/travelled half of the universe. Poor me... the furtherest place I have visited were Shanghai, remaining were some nearby countries like Indonesia, K.L, Hong Kong and Bangkok... feel like my life is wasted. If I can replay my life, I would do well in my studies and took good care my health!



Well... perhaps, if I would have replay those episode in my life I might not know God or even Andy. I think that is all God's plan and just part of life that we have to follow.